Posts tagged “friendship”

Chain of Care

Posted on September 16, 2017

I met this great guy M in hospital who’s my age and feels like a brother from another mother. He’s really easy to talk to and he even called me today to make sure I wasn’t just hibernating in the house like I told him I’m inclined to do. Luckily, I’d actually left the house today, only to run a few errands, but I’d left my cocoon, that’s the main thing. I really appreciated him checking on me, especially when he has his own stuff to tend to. To be honest, all the friends I’ve made through hospital admissions are thoughtful like that. None of them need a day like yesterday’s R U OK day to be prompted to check on one another. We…

Tagged: care, friendship, hospital, relationships, RUOKday

Friends who get it

Posted on September 13, 2017

I had ECT this morning. I’m feeling fine now except for my wrist where the anesthetist put the cannula in hurts like a motherfucker. I think he blew out the vein there coz it hurt like hell when he did it and since I’ve got home the pain has just gotten worse. I made the mistake of leaving before my doctor had come to see me today which panicked the hospital. I felt like a little kid in trouble with the Principal the way the Nurse scolded me on the phone. Eventually my Doctor called and apologised for not coming to see me before I left which put me at ease a bit. I have my last ECT session next Wednesday. I can’t wait…

Tagged: ECT, friendship, hospital, mental illness, side effects

Oddly Enough

Posted on September 4, 2017

This probably sounds weird, but I actually miss being in hospital. I miss the friends I made and the availability of people to talk to and laugh with. I know a Psychiatric Hospital doesn’t sound like it’d be a barrel of laughs, but you’d be surprised. Most of us learned to laugh at ourselves long ago. I cracked my friend M up as he saw me wheeled back to my room after my first ECT treatment. Apparently I looked like a clown with one of those insane smiles whose mouth you throw balls into. I lost it with laughter when he told me that. It must have been some killer anesthetic drugs I was on. Every time I stay in hospital I meet the…

Tagged: ECT, friendship, hospital, side effects

Oh the people you will meet

Posted on August 17, 2017

One of my favourite people I’ve met in hospital was N, an elderly Italian lady who spoke a mix of English and Italian to me that tested my High School Italian classes to their limits. She’d push her little trolley around, with a crochet blanket she’d be working on for her grandchildren in her spare time, down the hallway toward the doorway that led to the smokers area. She was always grateful when I’d slow down to walk with her, where she’d leave her little purple trolley at the end of the hallway and come outside for a dart with me. She’d lose her cigarettes all the time, so she’d hit me up for a smoke three of four times a day. No matter…

Tagged: friendship, hospital, kindness

Shocked

Posted on August 12, 2017

There are days where I think keeping this blog is probably foolish, and will negatively impact the way people perceive me, but then there are days like yesterday where I receive emails from people I haven’t heard from in a long time who support and praise me for being brave enough to share my story. Personally, I don’t think it’s brave. For me, it’s just living authentically. For years, I kept the severity of my mental illness on the down low. I didn’t want people to look at me differently. People knew I was ‘crazy’ but they didn’t realize how sick I actually was because I downplayed it or made light of it. But the last few years, between OCD and it’s Psychotic features,…

Tagged: Depression, Disappointment, ECT, Feedback, friendship, Optimisim

Good Day

Posted on August 5, 2017

Huzzah! Today I left the house to go out with a friend for the first time in months. I said no initially, because I always do, but also because I hadn’t showered and my hair was looking shithouse and the idea of putting on a frock was just too overwhelming. But he said he’d call back in ten minutes to see if I’d changed my mind, and by then I’d noticed a dress I could wear hanging on the back of the dresser, shoes on the floor and a cardigan close by. I wasn’t putting on a face, but fuck it, I thought. It’s only Springvale and I was with the only person I could say to half way through the trip “I’ve gotta…

Tagged: Anxiety, food, friendship, good day

RUOK? AMIOK?

Posted on August 2, 2017

I’m one of these people who are skeptical about the value of RUOK day. It honestly feels like it’s a self serving day for people to feel good about themselves, and pat themselves on the back for being so kind as to reach out to someone they think might be struggling. Don’t get me wrong, I can appreciate setting aside one day a year to talk about suicide openly, and to ask the people around you how they’re doing. But really isn’t that a discussion we should be having regularly with our loved ones and friends, instead of a tokenistic offering once a year? And do we really talk about suicide openly, ever? Right now, the day seems merely an excuse to change one’s…

Tagged: friendship, mental health care plan, relationships, RUOKday, suicide, treatment

When The Clouds Shift Briefly

Posted on August 2, 2017

Unexpectedly, I’ve had some really kind people contact me to ask how I’m doing. People who have their own things going on, like even being sick themselves, but still took to the time to check in and see how I am. I am so incredibly lucky to have people in my life who look out for me like that. Being chronically depressed makes it difficult to believe I’m blessed with people who love and care for me, but on days when the cloud shifts just slightly to let in the tiniest amount of sun, I can see how lucky I am. I’m staying up tonight to skype with the good folks at Nocd, about their OCD app and how it might be able to…

Tagged: friendship, loved, OCD